Enlighten Me
by BalthierFan6828
Summary: Balthier reminisces when dealing with his father's death.
1. Leaves and Grass

**So I don't know how this is going to turn out. It's a fic about Dr. Cid and Balthier that spans over several years. It's gonna be difficult since we really aren't sure how Dr. Cid and Ffamran's relationship was before everything happened so bear with me. No pairings as of yet, but there will be at least some slight Balthier/Vaan (sorry I just can't help it). I'm gonna rate it T but it will contain strong cursing, and probably a lot of it. Please review because I'm a little nervous about this one! **

**Enlighten Me**

**Chapter One: Leaves and Grass**

Balthier sat on his bed aboard the Strahl, a mostly empty bottle of Madhu at his side. He could hear the hum of the engines from where he sat, and it soothed him. He could see through the window that the light was beginning to fade, and the tall grass of the Ozmone Plain bent silently in the wind, dancing its own little private ballet. He had landed here so that he could think for a while, his emotions raging inside his skull. The others had left him alone for the most part, not knowing what to say or do to make anything any easier for him. He was grateful for that. Their silence was the best gift they could give to him at that point. He hadn't cried, no that was something he had not felt the need to do so far. He'd kept his past a secret for so long at this point, his past…his father, that now the man's death had a strange effect on him. He watched the waving grass quietly, having passed the stage of pure anger into one of quiet reflection. He would have never admitted, not even to Fran (who probably knew his feelings better than he did himself), that he was shaken in a way he had never been before in all his twenty-two years. But Balthier the sky pirate would not cry…no…leading men did not cry, they were tragic heroes who loved and lost and carried on without even faltering. Which was exactly what he would do. As the grass continued its epic performance a memory came to him, one that brought the slightest hint of a sad smile to his lips…

_Five year old Ffamran giggled as he ran through the tall grass. It tickled him as it waved in the wind, and was soft beneath his bare feet. "I'm going to get you!" called out a strong voice behind him, and Ffamran giggled louder as his tiny feet carried him faster away from his smiling father. All at once he felt like he was flying as strong arms and calloused fingers lifted him into the air, tossing him upward and catching him again before pulling him into a loving embrace. They made their way back to the house, Ffamran bouncing on his father's hip, his little fingers entwined in locks of graying hair…_

The pirate sighed and closed his eyes, fighting off the ensuing pain behind his eyes. Taking another swig of the potent liquor, he stood up and removed his gold vest in an attempt to be a little less uncomfortable. He unbuttoned a few of the buttons on his crisp, white shirt, feeling a little too warm from all of the alcohol that he had ingested. He paced the room for a bit, the bottle of liquor slowly diminishing. Once dry, he tossed it away and opened another; no he was not quite numb enough yet. He could still see the burning hatred and insanity that he'd seen in his father's eyes right before he'd fallen only hours before…it would haunt him forever. He pinched the bridge of his nose in an attempt to ward of the pain in his skull, and let his jeweled hand run through his spiky brown hair. He could remember when his hair had been long and flowing, as was Archadian tradition. That he did _not _miss. He could even remember when he'd had it cut this way…he must have been about seventeen…

"_You impudent little shit…" his father had cried, "How dare you go against my wishes like this? Well? Ffamran! Answer me!" He had stood there with his head down, not knowing any answer that his father wanted to hear. "I…I…like it this way," he finally managed to stammer, earning a wide eyed angry look from the older man. "You like it this way? Is that seriously your answer?" he asked. Ffamran stood quietly, still not knowing exactly what to say. His father did not give him a chance to answer anyway, "You do NOT disobey me in matters like this!" "Yes sir," he managed to squeak in return, still standing with his head down and his hands clasped behind his back. "Is that…is that an earring?" yelled his father after a moment's pause, bringing his fist down on his desk with a vengeful crash. Ffamran gulped, "Y…Yes...Sir..." "Judges do NOT dress themselves in such a manner," he father said, his tone more severe than the boy had ever heard it. "Father….I…I do not…wish to be…a judge," Ffamran managed to say, regretting it at once. "Jesus fucking Christ Ffamran!," yelled his father, "You don't have a fucking choice! It's an honor! I mean what the hell else would you want to do?" The boy gulped again, "I'd…I'd like to be a sky pirate," he said. _

His father had been less than forgiving that day, but the pirate tried to remember that he'd been already half crazy with nethicite by this time. He slipped his hand into his shirt and felt the old, raised scars that spanned his back…no…he was not sure he could forgive his father for that day, whether he had been himself or not… He continued to drown his sorrows in the thick, dark liquid. There was a soft knock at his door, causing the pirate to stop in his tracks and turn his head toward the door. "Balthier?" came a soft voice from the hall outside. The brunette couldn't help but smile to himself. He was surprised that the desert boy hadn't shown up sooner. At first he'd hated they boy, he was too energetic and innocent for the pirate's taste, but sometime later the brunette had somewhat taken the boy under his wing. Now, though he would never admit it (even to himself), he was quite fond of the boy. In fact, he had a certain attraction to the blonde teen, though he was sure that he just saw a bit of his old self in Vaan. He unlocked the door, making sure not to smile at the boy as he stood there awkwardly in the doorway, shuffling his feet. "Did you need something?" he asked the boy. "I just wanted to make sure you were…you know…ok," said Vaan, not daring to enter the room. "I'm fine Vaan," retorted the pirate, "No reason I wouldn't be." He said nothing more before closing the door in the boy's face.

The young brunette returned to his bed, and laid back letting his head bump painfully into the wall. His eyes were attracted to the ticking clock on the wall…it was going to be a long night. He wished he would fall asleep, but he knew he probably wouldn't be able to get much rest that night….

_To be continued…_

**Hope you enjoyed. Please review!**


	2. Push it Away

**And we're back. Welcome to chapter 2 of Enlighten Me, which I took forever to update because I've been working on other stuff. This story is rated T, for strong cursing. Slight Bal/Vaan, but not a lot. Reviews are appreciated. Enjoy.**

**Enlighten Me**

**Chapter 2**

**Push it Away**

"I can't move another step," moaned Penelo as she dropped to the sopping wet ground of the Giza Plains, "I'm NOT moving until I catch my breath." The pirate scowled at the interruption as Ashe also plopped down, panting. He scanned the area for potential threats as his other two companions savored their break, it was the first he'd let them have in hours. Ever since the death of his father he'd developed a personal interest in the quest, whereas before he'd just been along for the ride in hopes of a big payout in the end. The rain pelted down on him, soaking his white shirt through until it clung desperately to his skin. His hair had matted to his forehead, and he pushed it back with a ringed hand, "We should get moving," he barked, earning an aggravated sigh from the others. It had been going on this way for days now, the pirate insisted on leading the group, and any fiend who came within eyesight of the brunette he attacked. They had been going out three at a time mostly, attempting to gain battle experience, which the girls especially needed. Instead of switching out two groups of three, Balthier insisted on leading both parties, letting the others switch themselves out whenever they got too tired. "I can't, Balthier," whimpered Penelo, "I just can't." The pirate sighed, "Go back to camp, both of you," he said, glancing from Penelo to Ashe, "Send back Basch and Fran in your places." "Don't you think you should come back too?" questioned Ashe, attempting to push her blonde hair out of her eyes. "No, just do as I say," snapped Balthier, shocking the princess a little by his tone.

"And you couldn't convince him to even come back and rest a while?" asked Fran, gathering her bow and quiver. "He wouldn't even discuss it," said Penelo as she nearly collapsed by the fire in their makeshift shelter. "We'd best not keep him waiting," said Basch, "if he were to be ambushed alone out there it would not bode well for him, especially in his condition."

Balthier sat on a rock by himself, waiting for Basch and Fran so that he could lose himself in another few hours of battle. He shivered slightly, trying to remember the last time he'd been completely warm and dry. His eyes ached with exhaustion, but he had been unable to sleep for the last few days. Every time he finally drifted off into slumber he was awakened by nightmares unlike any he had ever had before…

"_What in Shemhazai's name where you thinking Ffamran?" bellowed his father as the young judge stood motionless before him, his head bowed in a mixture of respect and slight fear. "I…I suppose I wasn't thinking Father," he replied weakly, assuming it was what his father wanted to hear, "I'm sorry." "You're not a child anymore Ffamran!" yelled his father as he tossed a book down forcefully onto his desk, "Sorry isn't going to cut it!" "I just thought…since…you know today is…" stammered the young man, still not daring to look up at his father. "What?" questioned the old man forcefully. "Mom's birthday," the brunette whispered, finally risking a glance up, regretting it immediately. His father, nearly shaking with anger, stomped over to where his son stood, and without warning slapped him as hard as he could across the face, "You don't mention her Ffamran!" he bellowed, grabbing him by his shoulders and shaking him harshly, "She is dead to us! Do you hear me?" Ffamran didn't move, didn't dare to lift his hand to his throbbing face, "Yes, Father," he muttered, tasting blood on his lip. That seemed to satisfy the old man, and he walked back and sat at his desk as if his son where not in the room at all. Ffamran turned to leave the room when he heard his father call to him, "Ffamran…" and for a moment he thought perhaps his father was going to say he was sorry, that just maybe there would be a small gap in his madness and the loving father he had known when he was little would return. "Ffamran!" his father called again, this time in a much more stern voice, "Don't ever skip your official duty for such nonsense again or I'll beat you until you can no longer stand." He observed the casual way his father said this, not even bothering to look up, and he knew he had to leave this place for good. He wanted to tell the old man that he hated him, that he wished he were dead, but all he managed to squeak out was a small, "Yes, Sir," before turning and leaving the room._

Balthier opened his eyes, forcing the painful memory into the back of his mind. He stood up as he heard the others approach him, and twirled his whale whisker with his ringed fingers and placed it on his back, "Let's move," he barked at the others, "We don't have much time before it gets dark." Basch and Fran looked at each other, and said nothing, but followed the pirate through the rain silently…

_To be continued…_

**Hope you enjoyed, dedicated to my bf who is a Dr. Cid fan. Reviews are polite!**


	3. You Can't Hide

**Welcome to chapter 3, titled You Can't Hide. Hope you enjoy, please review.**

**Enlighten Me**

**Chapter 3 **

**You Can't Hide**

"It's not that bad," argued Balthier as Fran attempted to remove his blood soaked vest and shirt, "Really, I doubt it even warrants looking at." Fran raised an eyebrow at the pirate's words and continued her task. "Um, Balthier," muttered Basch from where he stood, now eyeing the long, jagged cut on the pirate's side, "I think that counts as bad." The brunette sighed and risked a glance down at his side. The other man was right, the cut was quite deep, and between the rain that kept pelting down on them and the blood that was flowing freely from the wound Fran was having a hard time bandaging it. "Fine," grunted Balthier finally, "it's bad. Now heal me so we can continue on our way." His two companions looked at him as if he were absolutely insane. "Shall I carry him back to camp then?" Basch asked, turning to Fran and ignoring the pirate's comment entirely. "Yes, I think that would be best," said Fran, and without a word to the pirate she began gathering up their things. "Hey! Wait just a minute!," he stammered as tall blonde hoisted him up into his arms. "Put me down, Basch," growled Balthier, "No one carries the leading man." "Suit yourself," said Basch as he sat the pirate down roughly on his feet, which made the brunette immediately regret opening his mouth. In the end he had to lean most of his weight on the older man, and he thought at one point he might lose consciousness, but the thought of him being carried back into camp like a child kept him alert.

Luckily they had been close enough to their makeshift camp when the little incident had happened that the pirate managed to keep his dignity and walk there himself, but the elementals that were dotting the plains at the moment made it impossible for the others to heal him. Being warm and dry by the fire felt better than he had imagined anything could feel, but he was not thrilled with the aspect of lying there until either the elementals left and someone healed him or his side healed of its own accord, which was going to take days…if not a week. "Be a good girl Fran and toss me a potion," grumbled the pirate as Basch inspected his wound. Fran dug through her pack, and Balthier knew from the scowl on her face exactly what she was going to say, "It seems as if we are out of potions." "We'll have to sew it up you know," said Basch, crossing his arms and sitting back against the wall, "It's too deep and we have no way of healing you." The young brunette grimaced, no, he was not afraid of being haphazardly stitched up with no relief from the pain, but still he was not going to enjoy this. "And which of you may I ask is qualified to perform this little procedure? I'd appreciate not having a huge scar." Basch raised his eyebrow, noting that the pirate's arms, chest, stomach, and back already had too many scars to count, "Yes we'd hate to ruin your perfect skin," he muttered under his breath. Fran had more experience with such things, and she was really the only one of their gang that Balthier trusted completely, so it became her job to stitch up her unlucky partner. "Are you ready then?" she asked, poised above him. He nodded and closed his eyes, "Fuck!" he exclaimed through clenched teeth as the needle dug into his side. He was good with pain, it was an old companion of his, but when he started to lost consciousness he let the darkness take him…and he was grateful for it.

_Cidolfus Bunansa drummed his fingers on the arm of his chair. He sipped his drink calmly, although his insides were raging with anger. Damn that boy! Couldn't he ever do what he was told? He heard the front door open and close in the distance, and for a moment he almost let his son go on up to his room unpunished for his lateness. "Ffamran! Come in here a moment!" He rose and poured himself another drink, and heard the boy enter the room behind him. He turned around and stared at his teenage son with cold gray eyes. The boy knew he was in trouble, and he looked so much like his mother standing there. She'd known when she'd been in trouble too. His grip tightened on the glass in his hands and he waited for the boy to speak. Ffamran said nothing for a few moments, he knew he was in trouble, he'd known exactly what he'd risked by sneaking out earlier with his friends and now he almost regretted going at all. "I'm sorry father, I won't do it aga…" his sentence was cut short by his father's fist making contact with the side of his face. He could taste blood in his mouth, and he wasn't sure if it was coming from his lip or his tongue. He looked up at his father, not bothering to try and say anything, not bothering to try and run away from him. It'd just be worse next time if he did. Cidolfus felt the tiniest hint of sympathy for the boy suddenly, but it vanished when Ffamran stared at him with those big chocolate eyes…eyes just like hers. His vision turned red, and he felt as if he'd been put on autopilot. He didn't even realize the extent of the damage he'd done until Ffamran stopped moving. He stood there looking down at his son, curled up into a ball on the floor. Little rivers of crimson were running from various wounds, his skin was swollen and purple bruises were already rising to the surface. He cursed under his breath and rolled the boy over onto his back, thanking the gods silently that he wasn't dead. "I'm sorry, Ffamran," he whispered, but the boy couldn't hear him…_

"Is he alright?" Basch eyed the sleeping pirate cautiously as he asked, listening to him mutter in his sleep. "His nightmares have grown worse of late," Fran said dryly as she poked the fire, "The battle with his father affects him more than he would have us know." The blonde nodded and took a sip of the bottle madhu that he and the viera were sharing, "What happened to him?" The tall viera settled back down against the wall, accepting the offered bottle from the blonde, "You are referring to the scars?" Basch nodded, unable to hide his curiosity. Fran sighed and took a sip of the madhu, "Each one has a different story, some of which I do not even know. The long ones on his back came from being tortured in prison a few years ago, or so he says." "You do not believe him?" asked Basch, fidgeting as to get more comfortable. The viera shrugged, "Balthier would have those around him think he is stronger than he is. A sky pirate being tortured in prison makes for a better story than a teen abused by his drunken father." Basch eyed her for a moment, "How do you know this?" "As you can see he talks in his sleep." "So you think he made the whole thing up?" he asked. "No, he was in prison, that much I know is true because that is where I first met him." she said causally, once again taking a sip from the bottle. "But no torture though?" Basch asked. The viera thought a moment, as if she were deciding how much of the truth to tell him, "Things happened to him there that he will never speak of, terrible things," she sighed and poked the fire again with a stick, "but those scars are in his mind. Not on his skin." Basch was a bit taken aback, "Are you referring to what I think you are referring to?" he asked, hoping for Balthier's sake that she wasn't. "It happens all the time in prisons," she said looking at him directly, "Why do you seem so shocked?" "Because it's Balthier!" he stammered, feeling a bit awkward talking about something so personal that had happened to the younger man, "And you know this is true?" "Like I said Basch, he talks in his sleep."

Balthier was awakened by a dull throbbing pain in his side. He tested his movements, not daring to move to suddenly for fear of ripping Fran's delicate work. He finally sat up, wincing as he did, and looked around. "Where is everyone?" he asked aloud, attempting to push himself to his feet. "You shouldn't stand, you're too weak," Basch scolded, coming from out of nowhere to help the pirate ease back down to the ground, "The others moved on. I offered to wait here and make sure you got well. We'll meet up with the others when you are able." Balthier scowled, "Why you? Why not Fran?" Basch sighed as he starting to unwrap the bandage around the pirate's waist, "Because I'm stronger in a fight and if we get attacked you're not going to be much help." The brunette was obviously not thrilled with the situation, which was made worse by the fact that the captain was playing nursemaid to him. "I can do that myself," he argued, earning an annoyed glance from the older man. Basch didn't say anything, but continued to remove the bandage. The sat in silence for a long while, and it wasn't until Basch had almost finished redressing his wound that Balthier spoke up, "Why are you being so…nice to me" he asked, giving the older man a wary look. "Am I usually not nice?" Basch replied, not daring to meet the other man's gaze. "No, but you seem…different today. I've been hurt much worse than this on this damned quest so far and never have I seen you look at me like I was an injured kitten." Basch let his confusion show on his face, "An injured kitten?" The pirate shrugged, "You know, like I'm pitiful or something." _Damn it, _thought Basch to himself, _if only Fran hadn't told me all of those things. _He'd never be able to look at the pirate the same way again after last night. He thought a moment, trying to decide how to respond when Balthier let an aggravated sigh cross his lips, "You've been talking to Fran haven't you?" Basch met the younger man's eyes, not surprised to see the anger that clouded them. "Balthier, I…" "No! Just shut up!," interrupted the brunette as he struggled to his feet, letting out a small whimper of pain as he did so, "Just don't say anything. I'm going to kill her; I'm really going to fucking kill her!" He was pacing now, and Basch made no effort to stop him. Finally, after a moment of silence on both of their parts the young pirate spoke again, "How much do you know?" The older man let his back rest against the wall, "Not a lot," he said, "She told me about prison, when you two met." The younger man sighed and dejectedly slide back down to the floor, "Mention it to anyone and I'll kill you," he said coolly, and Basch thought it sounded like he meant it. "I wasn't planning on it," he said, looking the younger man in the eyes to emphasize his point. Balthier didn't say anything for a moment, judging if he trusted Basch enough with his secret or not. "It's not something you want people to know," he whispered finally, "I'm sure you can understand that." The older man nodded, "Get some sleep Balthier. We'll speak no more of it if that is what you'd prefer." "That's exactly what I'd prefer," said the pirate as he closed his eyes and let himself drift off to sleep.

_To be continued…_

**Hope you enjoyed! If you want updates you have to review! **


	4. Never Too Close

**And we're back… Welcome to Chapter 4 of Enlighten Me. So let's get a few housekeeping bits out of the way. I'm going to try to make sure to separate when the characters are talking to make this all easier to read, and I'm going to apologize ahead of time because I know they will get (and have been) a little out of character. Thanks for the reviews so far and please continue to review to get updates! I hope you enjoy this next chapter.**

**Enlighten Me**

**Chapter 4**

**Never Too Close**

"_We're home my dear!" Dr. Cidolfus Bunansa called to his wife, bouncing a sleepy five year old Ffamran on his hip as he let the front door slam behind him. He continued down the hall, calling to her again. Still he received no answer. Assuming she had gone to bed early he climbed the stairs, smiling to himself as his son quietly dozed on his shoulder. After tugging the half asleep boy into his pajamas he tucked him warmly into bed._

"_Goodnight Ffamran," he whispered, placing a gentle kiss on the boy's forehead._

"_Night Daddy," he heard the boy mutter sleepily as he quietly shut the door behind him._

_He entered his own room quietly, so as not to wake his wife if she was already asleep, but he soon realized the room was empty and it didn't take him much longer to realize that his wife's things were gone. Unable to accept the idea that had now seized his mind he returned downstairs, searching in vain, expecting to see her around every corner. Her note was left in his study, and after reading it he could no longer delude himself…she was indeed gone, and was not coming back. He fixed himself a drink, and then another…and another. Entering a drunken calm, he sat there for some time, lost in thought before a tiny voice snapped him back to reality._

"_Daddy?"_

_Cid sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, "What do you want Ffamran?" he asked, not turning around to acknowledge the tiny boy behind him._

"_I had a bad dream."_

"_Go to bed Ffamran. It's late."_

"_But daddy, I…"_

"_Now Ffamran!" yelled Cid, turning around finally to face the boy. He immediately regretted his tone at seeing the tears that now stained his son's face, but lost in his own grief…he did nothing to comfort the boy, and only watched silently as tiny Ffamran ran back upstairs to his room, sobbing as he did._

Balthier's eyes snapped open, and for a moment he didn't know where he was. He was reminded of his current situation by a sharp pain in his side. He managed to sit up, wincing as he did.

"Is the pain bad?" asked Basch, who Balthier now observed was sitting not far from him, sharpening his sword.

The pirate smirked and gave himself a moment before answering so that he could be sure to disguise the pain in his voice, "It stings a bit," he lied, "Nothing to worry about. How much longer are we going to be here anyway?"

Basch thought a moment, "Depends on you. Actually let me rephrase that…it depends on your _wound._"

"Its fine," Balthier lied, "We can leave now if you'd like."

"Mind if I have a look at it?" asked Basch, already moving over to the other man without waiting for a response.

Balthier sighed, "I suppose…If you insist."

Basch ignored the angry glare that the pirate was giving him as he gently began removing the bandage from the other man's wound. He risked a glance up Balthier's face, and could tell by the way the pirate's eyes were clenched firmly shut that he was in intense pain. He cursed under his breath upon seeing the wound, which he had assumed would have begun to heal by this point. But instead of a slightly swollen, cleanly stitched wound he found that the pirate's wound was severely infected.

"You should have said something, Balthier," he muttered, "We might could have prevented this."

Balthier opened his eyes, and let out a small curse of his own at seeing the wound himself, "I didn't realize. I was asleep."

Basch didn't say anything as he poured some water over a cloth. He made a move to clean the wound but the pirate stopped him before the cloth could make contact, "I'll do it," he said, eyeing the older man warily.

"Balthier..,"

"What? I can do it! I don't need a damned nursemaid!"

"Fine…"

Basch tossed the cloth into the pirate's lap and moved back over to where he had been sitting before. He watched Balthier wince in pain as he let the cloth make contact with the aggravated wound. He was becoming restless here, and wanted to move on. Balthier, he knew, would not complain if he decided they should go ahead and leave, but he knew the pirate was in no shape to travel. He was not a man of many words, and was more than a little uncomfortable with being left alone with the other man for so long. _Especially_ after his little talk with Fran.

Balthier's hands were shaking uncontrollably, and he no longer cared if Basch noticed or not. He was weak from being injured as well as from a lack of food, and the pain in his side felt like a hot poker being dug into his skin. "Ok," he muttered once his vision began to blur, "I might need a little help."

Trying to be as gentle as possible, Basch began to clean the pirate's wound as best as he could. "Does that hurt too badly?" he asked, but Balthier had already slipped back into unconsciousness. Once he had cleaned the wound as best as he could, he wrapped the other man's torso in clean bandages, trying not to move him too much as he did so. Balthier moaned in his sleep a few times, and Basch would stop to make sure the pirate had not woken up. He was tired, having tried to sleep as little as possible in order to keep watch over the camp while the other man slept. He leaned back against the wall of the cave a few feet away from Balthier's sleeping form. He tried to keep his eyes open, but was unsuccessful. He was unsure of how long he slept before Balthier's screams woke him up…

_To Be Continued…_

**Hope you enjoyed. Let me know! Review for updates!**


	5. Sleep and Screams

**And we're…back. Welcome to chapter 5 of Enlighten Me which is rated T for cursing. I once again apologize that the gang gets a little out of character and if there isn't tons of drama in this story but I kinda just wanted to do an inner turmoil kinda thing with Balthier. This chapter is dedicated to Masaki-Hanabusa who has been nice enough to leave three reviews for this story! (Crowd Cheers) So thanks bunches for that! And remember guys reviews earn updates! Enjoy!**

**Enlighten Me**

**Chapter 5**

**Sleep and Screams**

Basch's eyes snapped open in sheer panic, his calloused fingers springing to the hilt of his sword as he stood with one fluid motion. Unable to see anything in the dark his hand shot out, releasing a Fira spell in the direction of the charred remains of the fire they'd had earlier. As light sprang from the flames, casting an eerie glow on the walls of the cave, he saw that their shelter had not been invaded by some fiend as he had thought. Still scanning the cave, his eyes came to rest on the sleeping sky pirate, whose screams had quieted and was now twitching restlessly in his sleep. Basch let his grip loosen on his sword and sighed, lightly scratching the scar that rested on his brow. A low moan escaped the pirate's lips, and Basch rested his sword against the wall and made his way over to where the other man lay. He made no move to examine the wound on Balthier's side, he was almost afraid to look at it now…had he known that infection was going to set in he would have never let the others leave, his healing skills were not up to dealing with something like this and the pirate was too weak to even attempt mustering up the magic to cure himself. He knelt down beside the younger man, unsure of exactly what he was supposed to do in a situation like this. Balthier moaned again, and Basch cursed under his breath.

"Balthier?" he said gently poking the pirate on the arm with one finger, "Wake up, it's…it's only a dream."

The younger man only moaned in response, "Nooo…father…wait!"

Basch cursed again, and shook Balthier gently, attempting to wake him…but the other man's eyes did not open.

_Ffamran glanced anxiously from one side to the other and pressed himself back against the alley wall as much as he could. He could hear the shouts of the men employed by his father to find him, and they were closer than he was comfortable with. He was unsure of which way to go, and cursed himself inwardly for not having planned the whole thing out better. He'd left in a rush, fleeing his father's harsh words and even harder smacks, and had not so much as thought about where he would go or what he would do once he got away. Hearing voices, he ran in the opposite direction. It was so dark he could barely see, and he had no idea of where he was going, or if he was even running in the opposite direction from his father's house. He bolted around a corner, nearly falling as he did. His breath now came in ragged gasps, and he tugged at the collar of his shirt in an attempt to make breathing easier. He struggled with a button for a moment, letting his guard fall just enough that he didn't hear the footsteps behind him until a heavy hand grasped his shoulder._

"_If you would stop acting like a damn child Ffamran," chided Cid, "I wouldn't have to do this."_

"_Nooo…father…wait!" _

_But his pleas didn't stop the whip from ripping the skin from his back…_

Basch finally succeeded in waking the pirate, but it took a moment for the younger man to realize what was going on.

"You were dreaming," Basch offered, hoping that would be explanation enough to ward off any further conversation on the matter.

Balthier seemed to calm down, and Basch was unsure whether it had been because he now knew that whatever images had been haunting him had only been a dream or because he took some kind of comfort at seeing he wasn't alone. He didn't ask.

"Did I wake you?"

Basch glanced back at the pirate, who was looking at him expectantly, "Doesn't matter. How…how are you feeling?"

"Like hell to be honest."

"Do you think you can muster up a healing spell? Mine are too weak."

Balthier chuckled, "I doubt it, I don't think I could even sit up."

"Fran's right you know," said Basch, "You talk in your sleep."

The glare the pirate cast in his direction could have melted ice, "Just the ramblings of a fever. Nothing more."

Basch eyed him warily and hesitated a moment before speaking, "It's not your fault Balthier. Cid was insane from the nethicite, he's better off now."

He immediately regretted what he'd said when Balthier bolted upright in an attempt to pull away from the other man.

"I'm sorry. I did not mean to pry. It just seems as though you've been…upset lately."

"And what about you _Captain_ Basch? Having your twin try and kill you didn't bother you at all?"

"Perhaps that's why I understand what is going on with you," said Basch, meeting the pirate's stare, "If there's anything…you need to…talk about…well….you know."

"Are we suddenly so close captain?" questioned the pirate sarcastically, "To talk of such things?"

"I just meant if you felt the need."

Balthier stared at him a moment, but offered no additional information as to what was going on in his mind. He wiped the sweat from his brow with the back of a ringed hand, "I'm sorry. Things have been…strange of late."

"I understand. I know that the day will soon come when my brother will fall by my own hand," Basch sighed, looking away from the pirate suddenly, "I…I know I have no choice in the matter, but still…"

Balthier didn't know what to say, so he didn't say anything at all. He merely lay back against the wall and ran his hand through his hair, "We need to try and heal this wound and get out of here."

"I know…"

_To Be Continued…_

**Hope you enjoyed! Review for updates!**


	6. Pounding of a Heart

**And…we're…back. Welcome to chapter 6 of Enlighten Me (a title which I promise will make sense by the end of this story) Still rated T for cursing, and I still don't own em'. Thanks to those of you who reviewed the last chapter, it is much appreciated. Sorry once again if people get a little out of character, but you were warned. Enjoy and please review!**

**Enlighten Me**

**Chapter 6**

**Pounding of the Heart**

With hazel eyes scanning the horizon for any sign of prey, Basch made his way through the flooded Giza Plains, sword at the ready. He and the pirate had not eaten in days, and neither of them were going to be strong enough to get out of here if he didn't find food…and soon. Droplets of rain cut streaks through the dirt on his tired face, and he wiped them away with the back of his hand. Hunger gnawed at his stomach, but it was a feeling he had become all too accustomed to in the last year or so, so he ignored it. Balthier of course had insisted on coming with him, and it had taken more damn time and energy convincing the other man to stay behind than he had wanted to give. He smiled to himself, almost admiring the pirate for refusing to sit and do nothing when their situation was becoming more dire by the minute. The infection in his side had gotten worse, and without healing, and soon, Basch was uncertain as to what would happen to the young sky pirate. Pushing the thought from his mind, he continued across the soggy terrain.

Balthier couldn't help but be relieved when Basch left, and for several reasons. First of all he had been more than uncomfortable spending so much time alone with the other man. He enjoyed spending most of his time alone, as did Fran, which might have been why they got along so well together. It had been the hardest thing for him to get used to since joining this insane quest, the constant company that is. He didn't mind the younger ones so much, Vaan's incessant chatter allowed him to stay out of the conversation for the most part, and Ashe tended to avoid him most of the time. But Basch was a different story. Being a rather quiet man himself left a lot of awkward silences between the two of them, and the fact that the older man had shown interest in his past had not helped matters. He knew Basch had good intentions, and that he cared deeply about the outcome of their long and perilous journey. Perhaps that unnerved him as well. The pain in his side had become a dull throbbing sensation that never ceased, and Balthier couldn't help but wince every time he attempted to move. He attempted another healing spell, but the light that flickered from his palm faded as quickly as it appeared, and did nothing to help the angry looking wound. Basch had done well at keeping the wound clean, and it seemed as if it might have been just a tad bit better, but the pirate knew he could not make the journey to catch up with the others in his condition. Why in all Ivalice they hadn't left Fran or even Penelo, who were the best healers in the group, instead of Basch with him he couldn't fathom. Of course Ashe had her own agenda, and Balthier supposed she'd needed Fran so that she wouldn't lose the Strahl as an asset while he was injured and Penelo and Vaan were the best at haggling for or even stealing supplies. With all six of them together there were few situations that could overwhelm them. Each had his or her strengths that the rest of the group relied on. It just so happened that both he and Basch's main strengths were in battle. Unlike Basch however he was, quite experienced with magic and could have healed such a wound easily had it been inflicted on someone besides himself, but his strength was zapped and his body would just not cooperate. He kept telling himself that if he moved he would work the soreness out of his side eventually, but he always regretted any sudden movements he made. Propping himself up against the wall, he examined his ruined shirt and vest, eventually tossing them aside with an aggravated sigh. At the sound of movement he grabbed his gun, only to find himself aiming at a surprised Basch.

"You mind pointing that thing somewhere else?", asked Basch as he dropped the carcass of some wild animal to the floor of the cave, "If I get shot we'll really be in a mess."

Balthier smirked and lowered the gun, "Looks like you had a bit of luck hunting. What is that anyway?"

"I have no idea; I've never seen it's like before."

"But it's edible?"

The older man shrugged, "Guess we'll find out. How are you feeling?"

"I'll live I suppose."

Basch nodded and returned to the task of skinning the strange animal he'd killed. The pirate watched him a moment, unsure of whether or not he should attempt to keep the conversation afloat. Finally he scooted himself over to the other man and took the dagger from his hand.

"I'll do this. You should get dry. Can't have you catching your death out here."

He waited a moment before responding, but finally gave in to the pirate and stood, removing his shirt and laying it by the fire to dry. He settled down in a spot not far from the where the other man was busily readying the animal to be cooked. The droplets of water that ran down his chest quickly dried and Basch began to feel warm and comfortable. Leaning back against the wall of the cave he closed his eyes, letting himself drift off to sleep. Later he would wonder whether spending so much time with Balthier alone had caused the dream he had that day.

_The battle had started off relatively simple. With Vaan and Fran in the background throwing healing spells and hi-potions whenever needed both he and the pirate had been able to focus on taking Cid down. Penelo and Ashe had also been some ways back, contributing to the fight with ranged weapons. Out of respect for the situation everyone followed Balthier's lead, letting him cast the first hit and dominate the fight. Even in the confusion of the fight the blank expression on the pirate's face had not escaped the others. Basch had wondered silently how the other man kept himself so in check, of course that had been before he'd had his chat with Fran and learned a little more about the other man's past. He was surprised at how quickly Dr. Cid was going down; perhaps this battle was going to be much easier than they had thought. The tables quickly turned when Famfrit was summoned to Cid's side. It didn't seem like their hits were doing much damage, and both Penelo and Ashe stopped firing to cast repeated Fire spells in the esper's direction. In addition to Famfrit's powerful hits, Cid was still firing. A bullet whizzed past his ear and struck Vaan, who went down immediately. Quickly slinging a raise spell in the fallen boy's direction he opened himself up to attack, and a powerful hit from the esper sent him reeling into blackness. Someone raised him, and when he opened his eyes he saw that Vaan had also been raised. He was unsure if it had been his own raise spell which had done it, but it didn't matter. His sword clashed against the esper, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Penelo hurriedly throw a phoenix down in the pirate's direction. Keeping him alive was imperative, it didn't seem right to proceed without him. Finally, the esper fell. After that they made short work of the good doctor. The five of them backed away, allowing Balthier to deliver the final blow._

"_Hadn't you best be off, fool of a pirate?" he'd heard Cid whisper in the end. He was unsure if the others had noticed the look of pure pain that crossed Balthier's face at hearing those words._

He awoke to the rich smell of cooked meat. Opening his eyes, he was surprised to see Balthier up and about.

"Sleep well?"

"Well enough. You've been busy," he said, pointing to the spit of roasting meat over the fire.

"I thought it was about time I made myself useful," joked the pirate, "Besides you needed the sleep."

Basch nodded, "Feeling alright? Don't overdo it."

"Stop nursing me Captain, I am quite capable of taking care of myself thank you," snapped Balthier angrily, but after a moment sighed and turned back to the other man, "Thank you for the concern though."

They ate in silence for the most part, and Basch was surprised when Balthier handed him a bottle of Madhu after the meal was finished.

"I found it in the bottom of one of the packs," he explained, "I thought it a welcome surprise."

"Very welcome," chuckled Basch, pulling the cork from the bottle with his teeth. They passed the bottle back and forth for some time, the liquor making conversation easier for the both of them. Eventually the conversation drifted from light hearted chatter to the quest at hand.

"I've often wondered what is in all this for you and Fran."

Balthier shrugged, "It seemed profitable at the time, and then…well…now it's personal."

"It seemed the empire has taken someone from all of us," sighed Basch, "Perhaps that's what binds the six of us together."

"I lost my father long before the evil of the empire took him, but I suppose you already knew that."

"You really hated him didn't you?"

"Yes and no," answered the pirate, accepting the half empty bottle the captain offered him, "The man was insane, some of what he did is not entirely his fault. But believe me, as I'm sure you'll soon find out, killing the last of one's own family…even if you have no choice…is not something easily lived with afterwards."

Basch didn't reply.

"I'm sorry. That was tactless of me," Balthier offered, and he seemed to mean it.

"It's true I suppose. But Noah made his choice, and he leaves me none."

"The same could be said of the good Dr. Cid; still…I can remember when he was a very gentle man. But I saw none of that in his eyes when he fell. Nothing of the man I knew as a child," said the younger man, looking away suddenly and taking another swig from the bottle.

"You left when his mind began to leave him then?"

"Hmm? No, not for quite a few years after that I'm afraid. I suppose I thought he'd get better, but then again I was too young to go anywhere anyway."

"His insanity began so long ago?"

The pirate nodded, "when I was five to be exact. Right after my mother left us. He…he was never the same. Amazing how much one event can change a person. How it can make them hate the people they were once close to. Before she left he used to make me these little toy airships that flew by remote," he chuckled at the memory, "we used to go and fly them almost every afternoon, it was my favorite thing in the world." The smile faded from his face as reality sank back in, and Basch pretended for Balthier's sake that he hadn't seen a rogue tear escape the pirate's eye, only to be quickly wiped away with ringed fingers.

"Noah and I preferred toy boats," he said suddenly, not knowing why he did, "we spent a lot of our childhood watching them float in the harbor. It was…peaceful."

Balthier managed a weak smile, "how did it all get so fucked up Basch? What happened to the good old days when all we had to worry about were lazy afternoons of play? What happened to the people with whom we share those memories?"

"Things change, people change I suppose."

They fell silent, both lost in their own painful memories, and the only sound to be heard besides the falling rain was the pounding of their hearts.

_To be continued…_

**Ok so once I beat Dr. Cid and Famfrit in the game I had to go back and do some leveling up before facing off with Gabranth and Vayne for the last time and I did that in the Giza plains so that's where the inspiration for most of this came from. Hope you enjoyed! Reviews earn updates!**


	7. Wash Away the Blood

**Welcome to chapter 7, I hope you enjoy. Hopefully they will not get too out of character. And yes, finally, they are leaving Giza! Please review, because it earns updates. Oh and I still don't own em'.**

**Enlighten Me**

**Chapter 7**

**Wash Away the Blood**

"I'm not sure this is a good idea," said Basch as he eyed the pirate warily.

Balthier hoisted his pack onto his back, attempting to hide the pained expression on his face as he did, "It'll be fine, I'm more than healed enough to get back to the Strahl."

"We don't even know if it is still where we last saw it; Ashe could have had Fran fly them anywhere."

"Fran knows better than to move my ship without telling me," the pirate grumbled, placing a ringed hand gently on his injured side, "Plus we can't stay here forever. We need to move on."

Basch frowned. The younger man's injury was nowhere near healed. The infection seemed to have lessened, but he could tell that Balthier was suffering. He could barely walk, and he was pale…too pale, with dark circles under his eyes. He was also covered in a clammy looking layer of sweat that Basch was sure was the product of a fever. It was the first time he'd seen the other man looking so ragged and pitiful.

"Come on, we're wasting time."

Balthier knew damn well that attempting to leave the cave in his condition was a bad idea, but he didn't see any alternative. He also knew that Basch was not fooled at all by his swearing he was fine, still though, he still kept up the lie. It wasn't too bad at first, and it helped that Basch was keeping his pace slower than he normally would have. They crossed a bridge over a flowing stream; and Balthier couldn't help but wonder if places like this reminded Basch of the little boats he and his brother used to sail as a child. He knew that when he flew the Strahl it never ceased to remind him of sitting atop his father's shoulders, flying a toy airship that made him feel like he was on top of the world.

"If you need to stop," said Basch, turning slightly in the other man's direction, "say something. If you overdo it out here there is nowhere for us to take shelter. It could quickly turn into a disaster."

"What did I say about nursing me?"

"I'm just saying, Balthier."

"Well don't."

Basch sighed and shook his head; he could only do so much. He'd be glad when they found the others, or at least got to civilization so that he could get some potions and things, maybe even hire someone to heal Balthier if they didn't find the others first.

"Your stubborn you know," he finally said, raising an eyebrow and falling in step with the younger man.

"I'm the leading man," explained the pirate, still gripping his side, "I don't need a nursemaid, and I don't sit out injured while others have all the fun."

Basch chuckled, but said nothing. He knew the others had headed to Rabanastre, but there was no way he could be sure that they would still be there at this point. They had been supposed to meet them there days ago, and they had probably moved on, assuming that he and Balthier would catch up with them eventually. Had he been a praying man he would have sent up a prayer to every one of the gods that they would find the others, and soon. They did their best to avoid the few fiends they saw along the way, and it seemed to be working for the moment. Nothing had really bothered them, and the few that had Basch had made quick work of.

"How long until we reach Rabanastre? That is where we are headed isn't it?," asked Balthier.

"A day or so I suppose. I'm not really sure."

The pirate sighed, "The Strahl is several miles outside the city, perhaps we'll reach it by nightfall."

"If it's still there," muttered Basch, not loud enough for the pirate to hear.

They walked for what seemed like forever, Basch keeping his pace as slow as he could without letting the other man know he was doing it on purpose. Still, Balthier was lagging behind. He was just about to give in and tell Basch that he couldn't make it when he heard a low growl behind him. Basch must have heard it as well, because he spun around at the same time the pirate did. Several hyenas were closing in on them from the rear, only three or maybe four…nothing huge, but as Balthier spun around he felt a gut wrenching rip in his side…

Basch's sword made short work of the first two, while the pirate's gun quickly finished off the last of them.

"You're ok?" asked Basch when the last fiend fell.

"Naturally," lied Balthier, quickly hiding the blood running from his side with the palm of his hand.

Basch didn't seem to see the blood, and Balthier was nothing short of relieved. The older man walked off ahead of him, and the pirate quickly glanced down at his bleeding side. He couldn't see past the growing red stain spreading over his white shirt, but there was too much blood for it to be anything short of a disaster. He quickly tried to cleanse the bit of material with the rain that was pelting down on him, but it didn't do much good, the blood wouldn't wash away. His steps were becoming slower and slower, his limbs becoming more tired with every step.

"Basch…" he finally called out, as his vision began to swim.

The blonde stopped and turned around, quickly gauging the situation when he saw the tiny streams of crimson running between the pirate's fingers that were clutched to his side.

When Basch heard the tone of Balthier's voice he spun around as quickly as he could, his eyes catching the crimson stain that spread along the other man's side. "Balthier?" he asked, starting to trot back in the other man's direction, "Fucking hell," he muttered under his breath as the pale pirate collapsed to the soggy terrain just before he could reach him. Balthier was still conscious, but barely.

"I may have been wrong," the pirate whispered, the pain evident in his voice.

"Shhh, don't worry about it. It's…its fine…everything will be just fine," Basch promised, but he knew it was a lie as he looked up to see a hungry pack of wolves glaring at them.

_To be continued…_

**Hope you enjoyed. Reviews earn updates!**


	8. Eyes Full of Panic

**Ladies and Gentlemen…welcome to chapter 8…Please enjoy, and remember reviewing is polite.**

**Enlighten Me**

**Chapter 8: Eyes full of Panic**

Basch cursed under his breath. They were in a hell of a mess now, and his mind was desperately trying to think of a plan. Balthier didn't look like he was going to be able to get up, much less help fight. He could take a few of the wolves himself, but he couldn't take them all, and he couldn't protect the pirate while fighting them off.

Balthier was fighting to keep his eyes open; it was a battle he wasn't winning. Basch was still crouched beside him, his hazel eyes full of panic. The pirate followed the older man's gaze.

"Fuck," he muttered upon seeing the glaring pack of hungry animals, "That's not good."

"Do you think you can get up?"

Balthier didn't even try to lie, "I'm not sure I can hang on to consciousness much longer. Just…just get out of here. Don't worry about me."

"Shut the fuck up Balthier, you should know better than that."

The older man stood, unsheathing his sword and putting himself between the half conscious pirate and the wolves. Balthier tried to move, he fought against the blackness with everything he had, but just as the first wolf launched itself at Basch's throat…darkness claimed him.

"_Didn't I tell you to study for this last night?" Cid asked as he eyed the paper in his hand._

"_Yes father," Ffamran muttered quietly._

"_And did you?"_

"_No Sir."_

_Cid sighed and adjusted his glasses, "I'm disappointed Ffamran. You knew you were not going to be able to pass this test today, why would you not study?"_

_Ffamran didn't answer. He was shaking slightly, hoping his father didn't notice. He had beaten him black and blue for a lot less than a failed test, and although he would never admit it he was scared shitless. He didn't look up as he heard his father stand up and walk toward him. He still didn't look up when saw his father's feet stop in front of him._

"_Look at me Ffamran," Cid commanded._

_Ffamran slowly raised his eyes to meet his father's._

"_Are you afraid of me?"_

_The boy didn't know how to answer; it seemed like a trick question_

"_Answer me Ffamran. Are you afraid of me?"_

_Finally he nodded silently, letting his gaze fall to the floor once again. He braced himself, waiting for his father's harsh punishment with tightly closed eyes. But the hit never came. To his surprise his father put his arms around him and drew him into a tight embrace. Ffamran wasn't sure what to do, so he just stood there, his head cradled against his father's chest. _

"_I'm sorry Ffamran," whispered Cid as he gently stroked the boy's hair. Overwhelmed by the loving gesture, the like of which he hadn't seen in ten years, Ffamran began to sob. He would never know what caused the momentary lapse of insanity in his father, but it was the very last time his father would ever be kind to him again._

Basch didn't have too much trouble slaying the first wolf, but by the time the third jumped him he was exhausted. He tried to keep the pack off Balthier, but every time he turned his attention to his attacker the rest of the pack returned to snipping at the injured pirate. Suddenly, an arrow struck the wolf in front of him, killing the creature instantly. He turned around, beyond relieved to see Fran already sending another arrow whizzing past him. With the others there it didn't take long to finish off the pack.

"We figured when you guys didn't show up in Rabanastre something might have happened to you," said Vaan as he and the others watched Fran administer several complex healing spells to Balthier.

"I'm glad you did. I am not sure how much longer I could have held them off."

After a few moments Balthier opened his eyes, "Am I dead?"

"No," said Basch, "but you almost were. Both of us actually. You're a damn stubborn man Balthier. What the hell were you thinking hiding an injury like that from me?"

The pirate sighed and sat up, "Calm down captain. Everything worked out in the end."

"We need to get moving," said Ashe, eyeing the horizon for any more fiends, "We have a lot of work to do before we can even think about facing Vayne."

Balthier was still weak from the blood he had lost, but he was able to walk on his own for the most part, having to lean a little on Basch's shoulder from time to time. He was unsure if Basch was really mad at him or not, but he didn't really care either way. Everything had worked out ok, although he knew that it had been nothing short of a miracle that the others had shown up when they had. By the time they reached the Strahl, the pirate was so weak and tired he could barely stand. It was Fran who helped him to his room.

"You are a fool Balthier," she said as she undid the clasps of the pirate's vest, "You should have waited for us in the cave."

The pirate, with Fran's help, removed his vest and nearly collapsed onto the bed. He sighed and closed his eyes briefly, fighting off the headache that was looming at the base of his skull.

"You have not been yourself lately," she said, crossing her arms, "Is it because of your father?"

He eyed her warily, "I'm fine."

"I have been with you long enough to know when you are lying."

He didn't say anything for a moment, but Fran wasn't about to leave until she got the truth.

"You're not going to leave until I tell you are you?" he asked.

"No."

"Fine," he muttered, "I may have been having some rather disturbing dreams of late."

"About Cid?"

Balthier glared at her angrily, "Yes."

"I'll not force you to speak of it if it upsets you this much," she said, turning to leave, "but you should Balthier. It may help."

He watched her leave, but didn't say anything. Deciding a shower would improve his mood he left his room and made his way down the hall. Once under the spray of hot water, his muscles relaxed a little and his spirits lifted a tiny bit. Fran was right; he had not been feeling like his old self since his father's death. At first he had been sure that he didn't care, but as his memories continued to haunt him he became less and less sure. He rested his forehead on the tile wall in front of him, letting the hot water pour over his head.

"_I'm sorry Ffamran…"_

It was that happy memory that hurt the most. It was easy to hate Cid when he remembered all the bad things, but that moment of sanity he'd seen his father experience broke his heart.

_To be continued…_

**Hope you enjoyed. Reviews earn updates!**


	9. Tears of a Pirate

**And…we're…back… Welcome to chapter 9 of Enlighten Me, which is probably the last chapter cuz it's starting to drag. Hope you guys enjoy it, and as always reviewing makes you a super duper cool person!**

**Enlighten Me**

**Chapter 9: Tears of a Pirate**

"_Father don't do this," Ffamran pleaded as he watched the enraged man throw another stack of pictures into the fire, "Just because she left doesn't mean we weren't a family!"_

_Cid spun around, letting his calloused hand hit Ffamran so hard across the face that the teen fell back onto the floor, "I told you to get rid of these years ago!" he bellowed, pointing to the fireplace, "I want no reminders of that woman in this house! How hard is that to understand!"_

_Sixteen year old Ffamran didn't attempt to get up from the floor, but watched in horror as the last remaining photo of his mother was burned to cinders. A tear slipped from his eye, but he couldn't wipe it from his face before his father noticed. _

_Cid grabbed the boy and pulled him to his feet, "No son of mine cries Ffamran! Do you understand me?" he yelled, banging the young man into the wall behind him. _

_He tried to force back the tears, and every time he failed his father hit him harder._

Balthier turned off the water and grabbed his towel. He dressed as he usually did, taking his time, making sure everything looked just right. He was interrupted by Penelo, "Food's ready," she said, poking her head into his room, "Fran said to hurry."

"I'm coming," he said placing his last ring on his finger.

Whatever Fran had cooked resembled some type of pasta. It didn't taste like anything in particular, but it wasn't half bad, and Balthier had tasted much worse in his life. Everyone seemed to be in decent moods, maybe it was because they were so close to the end of their quest, or maybe it was because they were finally taking a few days to rest up.

"You look as though you are feeling better Balthier," said Basch as he poured a generous amount of salt onto his food, earning a disapproving glance from Fran.

The pirate nodded, waiting to speak until he had swallowed, "I think I'll live."

"It's a miracle we found you in time," said Penelo, "I mean a few minutes later and you guys would have been wolf meat."

"I kept telling you guys we needed to go look for them" muttered Vaan, shoving a piece of bread into his mouth, "but you all kept saying they'd be fine."

"We did not count on infection setting in," argued Ashe.

"We made it out ok," said Basch, "That is what matters the most, it's no one's fault."

"Actually it's my fault," said Balthier, surprising everyone.

"Don't be absurd Balthier," Basch said, putting down his fork, "You got hurt, taking a hit that was meant for me if I remember correctly. You hold the least amount of blame in the matter."

"Basch is right," said Penelo, "We should have come looking sooner."

"It's my fault we left them there in the first place," Ashe muttered, "I put my own want for revenge in front of the well-being of a comrade. I'm sorry for that Balthier."

Balthier's head snapped up at the princess' statement. . He stared at her blankly for a moment, for some reason he'd not heard Ashe when she spoke, but his father. The others were quite shocked by what she had said. They all knew that her feelings toward the pirate were less than warm

"Excuse me?" he asked, unsure of what he had just heard.

"I said…I said I'm sorry," she stammered, looking from the pirate to the others.

"_I'm sorry Ffamran."_ He could hear it all too clearly in his mind, overwhelming him. He put his hand to his temple in an effort to push the painful memory away. "_I'm sorry Ffamran."_ Suddenly it was all too much, Cid wouldn't leave his thoughts. He closed his eyes, oblivious to the fact that the others were staring at him.

"_I'm sorry Ffamran," his father whispered __as he gently stroked the boy's hair._

"Stop it, Cid," Balthier pleaded aloud, "Please just stop."

Confused and concerned, the others had completely frozen in place when Balthier seemed to slip into his own little world. Fran rose from the table and went to her partner's side, crouching beside his chair, "Balthier," she cooed, gently stroking his hair, "What is wrong?"

The pirate shuddered as the viera's touch made the memory even more real to him.

"_I'm sorry Ffamran…"_

Balthier let a choked sob escape his throat, "Please…" he whimpered, unaware that he was slipping from his chair. He was caught by Basch's strong arms, which helped him sink to the ground without incident.

"What's wrong with him?" Ashe asked wide-eyed.

"We'd best get him to his room," Basch said, more to Fran than to the others, ignoring Ashe's question completely.

He pulled the pirate up, supporting most of his weight for him. Balthier seemed capable of letting the two lead him out of the kitchen and down the hall to him room.

"Do you need my help with anything?"

"I do not think so, Captain, I will call if I need help with him," said Fran.

Basch nodded and gave the pirate a sympathetic pat on the shoulder before leaving the room. Fran undid the clasps on Balthier's vest and removed it in order to make him more comfortable. He didn't say anything as she laid the vest over a chair and began to remove his shirt. Sitting down on the bed, she let him lay his head in her lap.

"Tell me what is troubling you Balthier," she cooed, "You miss your father perhaps?"

"Why would I miss that old fool?," he murmured pitifully, his voice strained from trying so hard to hold back his tears.

Fran was silent a moment, "Because it is painful to lose someone you love, even if they have done wrong to you in the past."

Balthier shut his eyes tightly, "He didn't want to be the way he was. He…he couldn't help it…it was Venat. I keep hearing him telling me he's sorry…"

"Balthier, running from this pain will only make it worse. Have you wept since his death?"

"Bunansas don't cry," he whimpered.

"I think you can make an exception Balthier," she said, petting his hair, "No one has to know, if that will make you feel better."

But Balthier couldn't do it, every time a tear threatened to spill down his cheek a voice rang out in his head…

"_No son of mine Cries Ffamran!"_

…and he wondered if his memories would ever stop haunting him…

**The End. Wow that really kinda rambled by the end, but oh well. Hope you enjoyed, review and let me know if you did!**


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